Hope springs eternal

April 10, 2008 at 7:07 pm 7 comments

I posted another ad for a houseboy in the Miscellaneous Romance section of Craigslist.

The last one got flagged off so fast only one serious response came through before it was gone. Some trick-ass bitch on Craigslist must really hate dominant women, or thinks that bona fide bitches who do it for the sexxay don’t really exist.

[EDIT: The post was up for all of five minutes before it got flagged again]

I was corresponding nicely with the one serious inquirer, but he balked when I asked for his first and last name. It’s just protocol, yo. You’re coming to my house, after all, touching all of my intimate things. Don’t I deserve to do a quick Google and sex offender registry search on you first?

I’m sure that you are all weeping for me in the face of my desperate plight, especially you poor submissive men in search of an owner. “Really, Omnivore,” you’re probably saying. “Aren’t you just a tad greedy? After all, you’ve got that delicious Bran playing puppy with you and fucking you hello, not to mention that young new boy who likes to kneel at your feet and sort your mail.”

To which I will reply, “Yes, that’s true. And I haven’t even told you about that sweet, curvy girl with the pixie haircut and the funky sense of style with whom I’ve only been on two dates.


“But,” I will say, “I am indeed a greedy bitch, and after 20 years of dating people, I’ve decided to stop feeling ashamed of asking for what I want. Bran’s too busy with grad school to clean and it’s not really his kink anyway. And while the sexxay is awesome, he’s not a pure submissive. The new houseboy shows promise in the personal secretary department but doesn’t really know how to vaccuum a room properly and doesn’t like pain. And Ace spoiled me forever in that department; I want another submissive boy with a high threshold for pain who will sweat and stretch and scrub until the place is spotless and then take off his clothes and kneel when I order him to. I want him to look up at me with that look, that look that maybe only Ace had but which I’m hoping to see on the face of another sub, a sort of dark and hooded and completely surrendered look that says I’m yours. Use me. Hurt me. I love it. And you love it. Please.

“I’m greedy enough to want two houseboys, not just one. AND a boyfriend. AND a girlfriend.”

Yeah. That’s what I want.

Is that so wrong?

Entry filed under: being a bad bisexual, bisexuality, Bran, dominance and why that's hot, femdom, houseboys, kink, love, men who clean my house make me hot, pain, pleasure, polyamory, sadism, sluts have more fun, submission and why that's hot. Tags: , , , , , , , , .

It’s so hard to get good houseboys these days Saturday night sex (plus: panties! on men!)

7 Comments Add your own

  • 1. ViciousWishes  |  April 11, 2008 at 3:27 am

    I’ll go with not wrong at all.

    I’d be interesting in knowing more about your screening process, besides the Googling and sex offender searches, and negotiation for houseboys. Do you set up a trial period? What sort of things are you looking for besides pain slut and good with a scrub brush? What sort of things are instant red flags?

  • 2. unspeakableaxe  |  April 13, 2008 at 3:44 am

    Not greedy at all.

    Can’t say that I blame you:)

    After all, if the ratio was the other way around and there were 100 dominant women for every sub male, I might want to serve multiple women!

  • 3. omnivoresdilemma  |  April 13, 2008 at 11:25 am

    Vicious, those are all awesome questions and deserve their own entry in response! I’ll try to post it this week.

    Axe, I thought you already DID serve multiple women! Maybe not on an ongoing basis, but it does sound like you’ve played with more than one woman in the same period of time. That reminds me that I’ve been wanting to comment on your “less desperate” entry. I’m glad that you’re feeling less desperate — not because it may or may not attract other women to you but because I know what it’s like to feel desperate and it’s a pretty crappy feeling. If you haven’t already, you’re going to make some woman a wonderful sub someday.

    These houseboy arrangements are definitely not set up to be exclusive. I certainly don’t expect most men to be satisfied with service and titillation. And I’m learning better how to keep the lines of communication open about both our love lives so that I can try to plan ahead in case they’re going to have to leave service.

  • 4. V  |  April 15, 2008 at 3:27 pm

    I wouldn’t call it greedy or wrong, but you might end of spreading yourself too thin and getting overwhelmed by your love-life. Maybe someday you’ll find the right mix of people with whom you can move into a big house;it seems like that would make things a whole lot easier.

  • 5. omnivoresdilemma  |  April 15, 2008 at 4:56 pm

    V, that is actually a fantasy of mine. We’ll see if it ever comes true. For the time being, I greatly enjoy my mornings alone.

  • […] as to how to find new applicants. Craigslist has been the best source so far for potentials, but someone on Craigslist has decided I’m either a spambot or a whore and flags my posts within mi…. This really irks me because it is the sexual exchange I’m seeking. My posts don’t […]

  • 7. Kink/BDSM dating sites « Omnivore’s Dilemma  |  October 8, 2008 at 10:57 pm

    […] responses, I’d hear from at least two or three sincere applicants. More recently, though, my Craigslist posts have been flagged off within moments of appearing. Given that they never violated the Craigslist Terms of Service (I know — I read them) and […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Trackback this post  |  Subscribe to the comments via RSS Feed

The search for truth, love, beauty, and mind-blowing orgasms

This blog contains sexually explicit material. If you are under 18 or offended by sex-talk, smut, kinksters, liberals, bisexuals, queers, poets, switches, bitches, or outspoken women, it's a free Internet (mostly) and you can go someplace else.

Sign up for email notification of new posts (you don't have to have a WordPress account).

Join 5 other followers

Click here to explore Good Releasing's various lines of adult titles and educational films representing independent artists who create authentic and diverse content.


%d bloggers like this: